Don't be a dick.

One of the simplest life lessons...

There I was, in a room full of successful people I had no business being around. My palms sweaty, trying to remember how to talk a good sentence at someone. All the while, I’m thinking “Why am I here?” or rather “How did I get invited to this?” Having been in this situation more than once I started to realize the dynamics around it. There’s room at most tables for somebody who is genuine, interesting and not obnoxious. Not saying that I’m those things, but rather I’m saying that I am those things sometimes. And sometimes, sometimes is good enough.

The beauty of a “+1”

I believe the “+1” was invented to help people invite people they enjoy being around or respect into other parts of their lives. Think about it. If you’ve got an extra ticket, or a +1 to an event. Who would you bring? Somebody that has “clout” but is terrible to be around? Or somebody that you genuinely enjoy being around and would love to start plugging into other parts of your circle. Seems like an easy choice to me. I’ve been blessed to have friends that have brought me to a lot of cool events and I couldn’t be more grateful for those opportunities.

Being genuine is a superpower

Don’t try to do too much, or be something you aren’t. Sometimes I fail at this, but the more and more I work on it, the more I see the long-term benefits of being genuine. If I had to break it down into practical steps, they would be: 1) listen, but like actually listen, if you can go a whole conversation asking questions and without having to talk about yourself, that is a win. That person will remember how you made them feel valuable. 2) Humor: if you’ve got it, use it. You are doing nobody any favors by holding your talents back. Use it, but don’t let it consume the conversation. Throw in some jokes here and there to let the other person know you aren’t a robot. And 3) Interests: talk about stuff you’re interested in, but talk about it with passion. This makes you memorable, and will be more engaging for the other person to listen to.

People want to work with people they like

I’ve heard this a million times and can confirm it’s accuracy. People will manufacture reasons to work together just because it sounds more fun than working with other dreadful but practical people. This is a good thing to remember.

How you treat people behind their back speaks volumes

I’ve seen people talk smack behind people’s backs thinking it makes them look cool, but all that does is make me wonder what happens when I leave the room. How you treat anybody is how you treat everybody. This was a real eye-opener for me.

Wrap Up

This blog was kind of all over the place, but I really just wanted to get back in the habit of writing these labors of love.

If you are new here, welcome and thank you for subscribing. As a reminder, I’m writing these to practice organizing my thoughts, to work on my storytelling, to develop a voice, and as a record for me to look back on what I learned in my 20s. I’m also trying to make them as engaging and easy to read as possible. PLEASE give me feedback. I crave it and would love to hear from people who are able to read all the way to the bottom because you guys are the real heroes!

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Also, I’m imploring you to send this to the most genuine person you know. Tell them it reminded you of them!

Until next time,

Matt